Do you believe that God is continually working in our lives and transforming our hearts and minds? Even when we feel vulnerable and lost? I can say now that I do. God can use our worst experiences as our greatest opportunities for growth and transformation.
In 2019, my life came to a crashing halt when I was diagnosed with life-threatening stage 3 colon cancer. I had been living the average life of a busy, overly committed mom and wife when the illness began to ravage my body, steal my identity, and threaten everything that made my life meaningful.
I began to question God’s plan. Why is life so hard for so many around the world? Why does God allow us to suffer? Does everything truly happen for a reason? I felt lost, conflicted, confused, and even angry. I grappled with what to pray for—wondering if God even heard me.
Facing cancer abruptly got my attention. I realized my life might be cut short, so I needed to find a way to live beyond my diagnosis. After wrangling with tremendous grief, fear, and heartbreak, I determined that the best way to find meaning would be to embrace the life God had given me right now, in the present.
This task was anything but easy. I had to let go of the life I thought I was supposed to lead and trust God’s plan for a new and uncertain path I was being led to follow. It also required traveling to new depths within myself.
I used this experience as an opportunity to get deeply present with my life, connect with my body, and engage with the world. I turned to prayer, placed my faith over my fear, and found peace by ultimately accepting my diagnosis. Acceptance by no means is letting go of or ignoring the emotions you need to process the experience. Rather, acceptance was coming to a place of simply being at peace with all of it. I had reached the point where I was ready to not just survive what was to come, but to thrive in it. I wanted to embrace every day and make the most of the time I had left.
I had to let go of the life I thought I was supposed to lead and trust God’s plan for a new and uncertain path I was being led to follow.
This process inspired me to take better care of myself and my family. It challenged my faith and ultimately brought me closer to God. It sparked a burning desire in me to become an active participant in my well-being journey. I embarked on a wellness revolution to reclaim control over my health and happiness—and have never looked back! I am now committed to helping others take power over their own healing journey by using the power of the human spirit, faith, and mindset to overcome crisis.
When I was first diagnosed, I struggled to know why this was happening. I know I am not the only one to feel that way. We want God to explain our situations and provide step-by-step guidance for what to do next. Yet God wants us to know him more and to develop deeper trust. As Proverbs 3:5–6 states, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” When we trust him, he makes our paths straight!
So how do we keep going when it all seems hopeless? Part of the answer is knowing you are not alone in the messy work of seeking meaning in your life. God was continually at work in my life, transforming my heart, mind, and spirit. He shined his light into my life even in the midst of my darkest season, pointing me in a direction that helped me find lessons along the way.
Life inevitably throws us deep disappointments. It is hard to blindly trust in the Lord when you cannot see or understand how any good can come from something terribly unfortunate or uncertain. But I am proof that good things can be found on the other side of suffering. The lessons I learned brought purpose to my greatest pain. I knew that sharing my story would become part of my life’s purpose, even if I didn’t survive the rippled effects of it.
Our tumultuous periods offer us the chance to practice leaning on our faith.
Thankfully, my family and I were able to survive my health catastrophe. And God used that season as a great teacher in my life. While facing down my own fragility, I learned powerful lessons about living in the present. I discovered how to let go of what I thought should be my happy ending and to live for today—the only thing we are all promised (see James 4:13–15).
Our tumultuous periods offer us the chance to practice leaning on our faith. They serve as invitations to develop a closer relationship with God. We can turn to prayer and ask for guidance and help during difficult times, knowing he is there with us on the journey.
As hard as it can be to make sense of at times, you too can feel prepared to put up with anything that comes your way by never losing sight of whom you are with—your heavenly Father. You don’t have to understand God’s plans for the path ahead; you only have to trust him.
It may not be easy, but I can assure you it’s worth it.
Erin Soto is an author and cancer thriver who inspires countless people to live wholeheartedly. @authorerinsoto
Scripture quotation is from the New International Version of the Bible.