How to Battle Imposter Syndrome: A Reminder That God Makes Us ‘Enough’
by Lori Ann Wood
The first contest I ever won involved a tiny clay dog sculpture I crafted in a summer art class and submitted to our county fair the following fall. My seven-year-old self was shocked to receive a prize. After all, I had taken only the one class, and I was sure the other entries had come from professional artists.
Inspired by that Reserve Grand Champion ribbon, I asked for a pottery wheel for Christmas. I took a few more summer classes, but eventually, around the sixth grade, my sculpting dreams died. I started noticing more gifted renderings in our school art showcase and felt I could not measure up to them. As hard as I tried, I never felt like a real artist.
For decades following my county fair victory, I had a recurring dream. A witch would suddenly appear in my bedroom and grab the lump of clay I was working on. With her pointy green fingernails, she inserted wires throughout the clay. I begged her to stop ruining my clay with the wires, but she just threw back her long black hair and cackled.
Lately, I have often thought about that dream. I’ve also discovered the name of that witch—imposter syndrome. It’s a feeling of phoniness, despite achievements and credibility, and living in fear of being exposed. Neil Armstrong suffered from it, as did John Steinbeck, Maya Angelou, Albert Einstein, and many other very accomplished people. So it shouldn’t come as a shock that a much less accomplished person feels it too.
Imposter syndrome: a feeling of phoniness, despite achievements and credibility, and living in fear of being exposed.
Doubt and fear can cause us to shrink back and lose both our voice and our confidence. Like the wires in my clay, insecurity gets in our heads and renders us useless. And it’s not just a modern-day problem. Even Moses begged for an exemption, feeling that his own words could never be enough (see Exodus 4:10, 13). The Bible is full of many followers who felt they were imposters, inadequate, not the real thing: Gideon, Joshua, Solomon, Jeremiah, even King Saul.
Every human heart will someday suffer from this affliction—big tasks to do, overshadowed by a crippling feeling of incompetence. But the God who makes us out of nothing whispers through the doubt, When I choose you for something, I already know you are enough. Paul explains in 1 Corinthians 7:17 that God assigned you a life to live. It may seem unlikely, it may feel awkward, it may bear no resemblance to your childhood dreams, but if you are walking in step with the Spirit, it’s right where you are supposed to be.
Eventually, I stopped dreaming about the witch putting wires in my clay. Then six years ago, I had to confront another even more menacing villain. I developed heart failure from a virus. After months with no improvement to my enlarged heart, I had wires inserted through my chest and into my heart to keep me alive. It was a risky surgery. My medical team doubted it would be enough. I had to travel eight hundred miles to find someone who would do it. When those wires went in, they could have made my heart useless, but something else happened. The wires made my heart stronger. My heart became even more alive, even more “enough.”
But the God who makes us out of nothing whispers through the doubt, “When I choose you for something, I already know you are enough.“
The wires in our creative clay and in our Christian life can do the same. Instead of making our attempts useless, they can spur us on to something much bigger.
Here’s some hard-won wisdom from a former county fair Reserve Grand Champion: The wires of insecurity are there as a reminder. You were chosen for this by Someone who has made your heart strong. You may feel like an imposter, but the real truth is, you have already been made more than enough.
Heart failure survivor Lori Wood writes to empower others to ask difficult faith questions. @loriannwood